S01 Ep15: The Power of Others’ Belief Over Our Lives

EntrepreneurshipSelf-Improvement

Mar 12

Written By Melissa Wesner

When it comes to pursuing our dreams, it can be helpful for us to understand the impact that other people’s beliefs about us can have on our success and outcomes. In the same way, we also need to look at how our beliefs about others and their ability to be successful matters too!
In this episode, you’ll learn about:
• The power of belief based on research
• The importance of surrounding yourself with people who believe in you
• The impact that your beliefs can have on others.
As a result of listening, I hope you’ll carefully consider the people you let in your circle, and I hope that you’ll make an effort to communicate your belief in the people around you!
Join me in Costa Rica in April 2024 (use the code DREAMANDDO when you register by 4/5/24 for a $200 discount!)
Melissa Wesner, (she/her) LCPC (00:22)
Welcome back to the Dreaming and Doing podcast. Today's topic is about the power of others belief in our lives. A lot of times we talk about how our own thoughts and beliefs impact us and that topic certainly warrants attention. For today though, we're going to be focusing on the power of other people's belief in our lives. So as we get started, I want you to take a minute to think about the person who has
always believed in you. I hope you have at least one person who's
Let their face come to your mind. And as it does, I want you to think about what that person has said or what that person has done to communicate their sincere belief in you. I also want you to think about the way that person impacted you and made you feel. We're starting here today because I want you to understand just how important it is to be surrounding yourself with people who truly believe in you.
especially if you're a big dreamer and action taker. In case you need some convincing of just...
a really interesting.
study that stayed with me since I heard about it at a conference years ago. The presenter told us that they did a study where researchers came into a treatment facility, interviewed clients, and then determined which clients were going to be successful in treatment and which ones were not. After completing their interviews, the researchers gathered the clinical team to share their findings. The researchers then provided the clinical team with
list of clients who would be successful in treatment and the list of clients who would not be successful. About one year later, the researchers came back to check in.
They had successfully determined which clients would be successful and which ones would not be. You want to know how they did it? They randomly assigned clients
They made up the list. The researchers weren't really studying the clients, but rather the impact that the therapist's belief would have on clinical outcomes. When the therapist believed that their clients would be successful in therapy, the clients were. And when the therapist believed that their clients would not be successful in therapy, their clients weren't. I've heard that a similar
was completed in the education sector to show how educators belief in their students would impact those students outcomes. I mean think about that. So many adults have these horrible stories from when they were going to school. So just imagine how important it is to have a teacher who believes in you or who believes in your child versus one that does not. What I hope you'll take away from hearing this is the importance of surrounding your son.
who truly believe in you. Because if the people around you believe in you, their belief is going to have a positive impact on you. As you're listening to this, I want you to think about the people in your life. Think about the people who are closest to you. Are the people who are closest to you people who support you, encourage you, and believe in you? If not, you might seriously
rethink who you're spending your time with. If you've got big aspirations, make sure that you're spending time with people who believe in you and who see your potential. These are the people who can see something in you that you can't even see in yourself. I see this as a therapist all the time.
that. I want to share about a social media post I saw over the weekend from Spanx founder Sarah Blakely. And in this post, she was talking about her best friend Laura, who passed away 22 years ago. In her post, she shares about how her best friend would tell her that she's going to change the world one day because it was her destiny. Even though Sarah Blakely at the time was selling fax machines. Her post references just
was and also her friends belief in her. If you're familiar with Spanx or if you follow Sarah Blakely then you likely know how things turned out. She's been quite successful and this is an example of the power of belief or the impact that someone else's belief can have on us. As a therapist I'm often sitting with my clients who are telling me all of these negative things that they think about themselves.
While I know that these thoughts are the result of their depression, anxiety, trauma, or family experiences, I often find myself amazed at the difference between the way that my clients see themselves and the way that I see them. I often think about how my clients have absolutely no idea just how fun or just how personable they are. So often as therapists, we really do see the good in our clients when they cannot see it for themselves.
because I am familiar with the study that I just shared and I understand the power of belief, I try to catch myself anytime I'm working with a client and I'm starting to feel a little hopeless. I make an effort to recognize that feeling right away and to get myself together. And when we bring new therapists onto our team, I encourage those therapists to do the same thing because if our belief impacts outcomes, then we need to be intentional.
about believing in what's possible.
So are the people in your life the ones who believe in you? Or is this conversation making it crystal clear that you've surrounded yourself with people who are critical or self -doubting? And maybe you didn't surround yourself, but you just kind of...
people that have happened to be in your life. But if you are surrounded by people who make you question your abilities, know that it's time to change that. You don't want their beliefs impacting your outcomes. If someone in particular is coming to mind, make note of that and become aware that it might be time to weed this person out. This concept works both ways. Not only do we have to be mindful of surrounding ourselves with
people who believe in us, we also have to be aware of our belief in others and how our belief impacts others' outcomes. In your professional role, do you tend to believe in others' abilities to be successful? Or do you find yourself doubting and being negative or critical about what you believe someone is capable of? How about in your family? Do you tend to believe in your family member's potential?
ability to be successful? Or are you the person who regularly squashes other people's dreams due to your
Are you noticing any patterns in how you show up here?
wrapping up here, I've got a few action items for you to think about. If you're the person who sees other people's potential and you're surrounded by people who believe in your -
We just want to keep that going. If you're a dreamer and a doer, but you realize that you don't have people around you who believe in you or who cheer you on, it's time to work on creating a new circle. You might want to think about people you need to weed out of your life and ways that you can surround yourself with a new crew of people who can truly see who you are and who know what you bring to the table. And lastly, if this conversation has you realizing,
who shows up with negativity and cynicism about what you or others are capable of, it's really really important to do some work around that so it doesn't impact you or others. Therapy and coaching are two really great options if you're looking to do well.
you. And if you're listening to this and realizing that there's someone you really believe in or someone whose work you really believe in and you just haven't told them, then I want to challenge you to make that known. Tell that person, reach out, tell them on the phone, send them a text, send them an email, leave them a voice message. You have no idea just how much of an imbib -
If you're listening, know that I believe in you and your big dreams too. If you're looking for a community of people who will support you and lift you up, know that we're heading to Costa Rica for the ultimate refresh, a six day all -inclusive retreat this April. If you're ready to find leaders and entrepreneurs who are dreamers and doers like you, check the show notes for details. If you need great people in your circle, I'd love to connect you to them. We'll be talking soon.